Today, I am 23 years old. Three years ago, a family member was diagnosed with a mental disorder which then led to a depression. Prior to that, I had only heard about these disorders but I had no idea about the destruction and the impact that they could leave on the people suffering from them, or on their families.

I started researching about these disorders to learn more. I was eager to know how I could help that person out of the situation that they were in and was looking for ways to support my family which was being torn apart since no one knew what to do. I had no clue how someone could end up locking themselves in like that, staying sad or so negative all the time, or how they could end up in a place where they would think of hurting or even killing themselves. Worst of all, they would still refuse to see a Doctor or take any medications.

But, as they say, be careful what you wish for right? Almost eight months ago, and due to several factors, I ended up with a severe depression, and severe anxiety myself. I was shattered, I didn’t know what was going on or what I was supposed to do. I’d get these panic attacks, I couldn’t study, and I thought my mind had stopped functioning, couldn’t sleep, these horrible ideas were stuck in my head all the time, etc…  Due to the lack of awareness of that field in Lebanon, the idea itself that I was going to be on that kind of medication and that I had to deal with those kinds of doctors gave me anxiety. Also, I just couldn’t comprehend how this pill will fix whatever it is that was going inside of my head, there was no way.

Long story short, I ended up going to the hospital and staying under the surveillance of Dr. Elie Karam and the other members of the team.

I came out of that hospital a different person, and I continue to get better every day.

Rather than looking back at what I’ve been through and feeling ashamed, tired of everything, or bad, I choose to look at it as if I hold a key that will open a better door for a lot of people that are passing in a similar situation.All in all, I would love to help, encourage and spread awareness.